sex and sensex

All of us knew that the ultimate aim of all our efforts is better sex. We work so that we earn money. We earn money so that our bedrooms are better, our kitchens are better, our cars are better, our bathrooms are better. We make these better so that the opposite (or in some cases, the same) feel more comfortable with us. It is necessary to make the opposite (or in some cases, the same) feel comfortable so that the sex is better. Everything boils down to the same thing - sex, more sex and better sex. What would life be without copulation ?

According to latest studies by some very eminent people, inanimate objects, and even dematerialised entities follow more or less the same principle. The best example would be the Sensex - an exchange with sex as its last name. A few examples would drive the point better.

Rising bottoms are always good for your junk. Your stock is at a better position if the bottoms are on the rise. The opposite applies for falling tops. Falls in tops indicate market malfunctions and are good for people with put options. So if you are hell bent on putting it, please do look for falling tops - from women or the market.

Good markets like good sex, always operate on very strong fundamentals. If the foreplay has not been good, then the (sen)sex goes mellow. These fundamentals would include elements like growth, inflation, money paid (if you know what I mean) etc.

The technicals obviously play an important role too. Exploration and rhythmic motion of the rises and falls would lead to better profits (and better orgasms). If you do not concentrate on patterns like the middle finger (or the head and shoulder) and do not believe in rising trend lines, you're in for trouble brother.

And these days, we are all getting screwed.

razor sharp images of the energy crisis and paris hilton

The vogue has come out with the top stylish politicians. Lalu ranks above everyone. Professors at Sri Sai institute of humanitarian biographics are now joining the all india ice poker team. My girlfriend ran off with the owner of a St. Bernard. My St. Bernard ran away with my girlfriend. The Commissioner of insititutionalising of geeks and nerds has gone missing since his last visit to the Agra Center for civic awareness. Guatemala plans to have the largest shopping mall and science center. Murder is now legal in West Indonesia provided it is only to save the marriage. Calcutta is to host the first official Ministry of Sound concert at Roxy. David Guetta might be coming down and jamming with Zakir Hussain and Pt. Ravi Shankar. Terrorists are now breeding surrogate babies to just overpopulate the world since killing people is passe now. the first gossip magazine on human rights is out. Arundhati Roy is on the centerfold. A public litigation has been launched against humming birds as they've been seen responsible for the sudden rise in divorces and same sex marriages. Scientists are now trying to genetically modify babies so that they dont have to bear with redundant parts. That includes our little finger, our appendix, and in Paris Hilton's case, her brain. Archies has now entered into a pact with undertakers to sell "Archies party funeral" cards through their stores.

God! It feels good to talk absolute shit.